Courage to Change by Sheldon Kardener
When we are unhappy with our circumstances, we often speak enthusiastically of the importance of change. Realizing that this entails giving up unresolved Needs, we try to have change on the one hand without doing anything different on the other. Therein lies the essence of conflict in the process of change:
The Adult, wanting change, runs into the tenacity of the child needing nothing to be different. The tension between these two states generates both the motivation for and the resistance to growth.
Emotional growth unquestionably requires courage. Think of how incredibly brave were medieval sailors imbued with Cosmas Indicopleustes idea that the earth is flat, yet they were willing to risk sailing beyond the horizon into the abyss. I therefore liken change to falling off the edge of a cliff. It does not take a long time. But our attempt to keep the land of the past in sight impedes our voyage in the present. The courage to grow includes both getting to, and through, zero by breaking free of old bonds and continuing to move in increasingly positive ways, even when we lose sight of home port.
In a recent television program about the animated 3-D film Coraline, its writer and director, Henry Selick, said that when he was young, he thought bravery meant doing things without having any fear. Now, as an adult, he realizes that bravery is all about being afraid but going ahead and doing what has to be done anyway. If all of us who want to change and anxiously stare at the void, the zero we have to traverse, remember that bravery means going ahead and doing what we have to do in spite of our fear, we can embrace our anxiety knowing that without fear there is no challenge, and without challenge there is no change.
Salvador Minuchin, a pioneer in the field of family therapy, in a presentation to a group of therapists offhandedly commented that he had been married to seven women. The audience gasped. He quickly added that perhaps he should explain. In his multiple decades of marriage, he could recognize the stages of growth his wife had gone through and the metamorphoses she had undergone: from the young bride, to a young wife, to a mother, and so forth. He felt most fortunate to have been able to grow with her, he said, otherwise they could have found themselves growing apart. Though such an outcome would have been sad and unfortunate, the consolation would have been the emphasis they put on growing, not on apart. Now that takes courage.
Copyright (c) 2010 Sheldon Kardener
Article Source: http://www.earticlesonline.com/Article/Courage-to-Change/702022
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Coraline (Paperback) $20.51 After moving into a new house with her family, a girl named Coraline discovers a mysterious world hidden behind a locked door. That world echoes Coraline`s real life--right down to a woman who claims to be her mother-- but everything in it is somehow off and creepy. When Coraline returns to her own dimension, she is horrified to discover that her parents have been taken prisoner in the parallel world. Determined to rescue her parents, Coraline resolves to battle the evil that lives on the other side of her door. Named one of the Best Children`s Books 2002 by Publishers Weekly. |
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Coraline - Widescreen $24.99 A young girl walks through a secret door and discovers a parallel reality that is eerily similar to the life she already knows, yet deeply unsettling in a number of ways, in director Henry Selick's animated adaptation of Neil Gaiman's international best-seller. Eleven-year-old Coraline Jones (voice of Dakota Fanning) is fearlessly courageous, and perhaps far too adventurous for her own good. Coraline and her parents (Teri Hatcher and John Hodgman) have recently relocated to Oregon from Michigan. Bored in her new home since her parents are distracted by work and she has yet to make any new friends, Coraline passes the time by exploring her new neighborhood with an annoying local boy named Wybie Lovat (Robert Bailey Jr.). But after paying a visit to her eccentric neighbors Miss Spink (Jennifer Saunders) and Miss Forcible (Dawn French), a pair of aging British actresses, and crossing paths with the outright weird Mr. Bobinsky (Ian McShane), the precocious young girl becomes convinced that her new surroundings are just as dull as she'd initially suspected. Shortly thereafter, Coraline discovers a hidden door in her new house, and decides to investigate. Venturing into the eerie passageway inside, Coraline emerges into an alternate version of her own reality. At first glance, this strange new world seems even better than the real thing; there her parents aren't distracted by work, and Coraline is always the center of attention. There's even a mysterious Cat (Keith David) that's fascinated by her every move. But when Coraline's button-eyed Other Mother (also Hatcher) attempts to make her stay permanent, the frightened young girl must summon her resourcefulness and bravery in order to find her way back home and save her real family. ~ Jason Buchanan, Rovi |
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Coraline (DVD) $15.6 After creating a classic with THE NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS, director Henry Selick crafts the first stop-motion animated feature to be filmed in three dimensions. Dakota Fanning voices a girl who finds a parallel universe lurking behind a door in her home, but the new world isn`t all it initially appears. Based on Nail Gaiman`s novel, CORALINE promises to be a favorite for both children and adults. |
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Coraline Graphic Novel (Paperback) $20.56 This is a graphic novel version of Neil Gaiman`s 2002 book, CORALINE. Although now heavily illustrated, the story remains the same: After moving into a new house with her family, a girl named Coraline discovers a mysterious world hidden behind a locked door. That world echoes Coraline`s real life--right down to a woman who claims to be her mother-- but everything in it is somehow off and creepy. When Coraline returns to her own dimension, she is horrified to discover that her parents have been taken prisoner in the parallel world. Determined to rescue her parents, Coraline resolves to battle the evil that lives on the other side of her door. Named one of the Best Children`s Books 2002 by Publishers Weekly. |
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Coraline (Gift Pack DVD And Coraline Watch) (Boxset) DVD New $19.99 Coraline (Gift Pack DVD And Coraline Watch) (Boxset) DVD New Format: DVD Runtime: 101 Year: 2009 Studio: Alliance Director: Henry Selick |
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Coraline by Neil Gaiman (Paperback) $14.3 Adapted from the book by Neil Gaiman to a successful movie production, Coraline finds a parallel world behind a locked door. That world echoes Coraline's real life -- right down to a woman who claims to be her mother -- but everything in it is somehow off and creepy. Coraline must rescue her parents who have been taken prisoner. Named one of the Best Children's Books 2002 by Publishers Weekly. |
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Coraline - Widescreen Collector's Dubbed $59.99 A young girl walks through a secret door and discovers a parallel reality that is eerily similar to the life she already knows, yet deeply unsettling in a number of ways, in director Henry Selick's animated adaptation of Neil Gaiman's international best-seller. Eleven-year-old Coraline Jones (voice of Dakota Fanning) is fearlessly courageous, and perhaps far too adventurous for her own good. Coraline and her parents (Teri Hatcher and John Hodgman) have recently relocated to Oregon from Michigan. Bored in her new home since her parents are distracted by work and she has yet to make any new friends, Coraline passes the time by exploring her new neighborhood with an annoying local boy named Wybie Lovat (Robert Bailey Jr.). But after paying a visit to her eccentric neighbors Miss Spink (Jennifer Saunders) and Miss Forcible (Dawn French), a pair of aging British actresses, and crossing paths with the outright weird Mr. Bobinsky (Ian McShane), the precocious young girl becomes convinced that her new surroundings are just as dull as she'd initially suspected. Shortly thereafter, Coraline discovers a hidden door in her new house, and decides to investigate. Venturing into the eerie passageway inside, Coraline emerges into an alternate version of her own reality. At first glance, this strange new world seems even better than the real thing; there her parents aren't distracted by work, and Coraline is always the center of attention. There's even a mysterious Cat (Keith David) that's fascinated by her every move. But when Coraline's button-eyed Other Mother (also Hatcher) attempts to make her stay permanent, the frightened young girl must summon her resourcefulness and bravery in order to find her way back home and save her real family. ~ Jason Buchanan, Rovi |
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